The Computer Graveyard

I've mentioned before that my computer at Munchang is probably the long-lost twin of the Commodor 64, but I'm pretty sure it's keyboard was the original prototype. Among the keys that didn't work were h, j, q, x, and the ever useful left shift key. Now, though I was getting pretty used to using the right one (with a little discomfort), upon further thought, I decided this wasn't a very humane way to treat your teachers and I put in a request: return this God-forsaken keyboard to the computer graveyard and find me a new one. To my surprise, I actually had a new one when I returned from lunch, but something wasn't quite right.

Um, Houston, we have a problem...