Above are some cool photos from the Taj Mahal that I took earlier this morning. I wanted to post some others too but it's taking AGES to upload photos to Flickr. Oh, I miss South Korean internet...There are a lot of cool things to see here but I'm seriously considering leaving. I didn't think it would be so hard to do this all by myself. I feel so incredibly alone here. I don't want to go but I don't want to stay. What I really want is a travel buddy but I can't seem to find one. No, what I really need is a hug. A big one. With lots of tissue. Or a super big distraction like a 12 page research paper or a newspaper deadline--even a job would do. I really want to be that person who goes off for three or 4 or 5 months to travel by herself but I'm not so sure anymore that I can be that person. I need people.
I'm probably just being irrational and all fo this will go away soon but I'm not exactly having fun in the meantime. I'm not too comfortable with soo much "me" time... Anyone want to come to India?
7 comments:
Gorgeous photos! WOW! I want a fish eye lens soo bad.
I'd be there tomorrow if I could! Keep soaking it all up for those of us that are living vicariously through you! :)
Oh my!!! You are IN India! What a crazy reality! I am so happy for you that you have gone and followed your hearts desires. You are pursuing dreams and figuring out what makes you tick - I think it is a rather commendable thing to be able to admitt that you need people. We are humans. God created us to be in relationship with others. Its a wise person who figures this out... I love you. Here's a hug - squeeeeeeezzzze.
OX
So, life is a learning experience. Actually it is good to need others and accept. Miss you honey and wish you the very best always.
Wow, Kortney! It's amazing!!! :D
I'm sorry you're missing your friends and family. Maybe it's time to come home? We'll all be here for you when you do. I'd love to go to India... someday. :D
Kortney this makes me sad to read that you are sooo lonely. I'd love to come but I can't. Keep strong and think of this as an assignment to let the rest of us see places that we otherwise may never get to.
~Mindy
I believe you will be surprised and meet someone else who has come alone when you quit thinking about it
and stop wishing so hard. I felt that way last year in Varanasi. Seeing happy small groups only magnifies the loneliness. While in another city--Chennai actually--I hired a tuk-tuk showing the driver a list of specific places. It turned out he was willing to stop any place I asked that caught my fancy along the way. I bought a string of Jasmine flowers from a seller along the road and can still nearly smell them. Agra is
tough, but you will be fine. It's Ganesha's birthday!
For what it's worth, I think I was in India about two weeks before I relaxed and started to feel comfortable. My friends and I had all been groped and hassled, it was hot and dirty, my friends had been sick - then one evening in Varanasi we kind of got lost. Just when we were starting to feel hopeless I recognized a store on a corner and we found our way back, and somehow everything shifted at that point, and I realized we'd be ok.
I'd say give at least another week or two and I bet things will get better. If you're still really not happy at that point, move on and be proud of yourself for making it that far and giving it a real chance. Take care!
Heather
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